Amy added this:
They all sat in silence, woundering who and what was ringing Fiona.
"It was just someone trying to scare us, perhaps it was one of Collins manegy friends, playing a trick" Thomas said.
"Its not, I know Collins friends are terrible but Collin wouldn't have told them yet, Maybe that wasn't Collin who we saw in the woods this evening, THAT definatly was not Collin down at our house, it must be an alien" Josh explained.
"DON'T BE SILLY JOSH" Fiona said.
"I know, you know where Collin lives, don't you Josh" Kate said.
"Yes, down the road his house is called ''Sheedrum''" Josh said.
"Then lets go down there and see if he is really behind this"
"I don't know, guys I don't know is this safe" Thomas said acting so scared.
"Do you want Nan and Dad and Mum home" Fiona said.
"Yes but maybe you should try again on your mobile"
"Make sure you diall the number correctly, you know it 021885richard"
"I dialled it right and he is not answering"
The four of them walked down the road and in through the gates of the big manson where Collin lived.
Thomas was hold Goldi tight.
They knocked on the door ''BANG BANG BANG"
A big tall man opened it and said"What are you kids doing here, go home immediatly"
Thomas ran as fast as lighting followed by Fiona, Kate and Josh.
"I AM NOT GOING BACK THERE AGAIN"
"Fiona maybe Dad has been in an accident, that would explain why Mam and Nan aren't home"
"That wouldn't explain why I saw a person, like a ghost at our house" Josh said.
"Just call the local hospital and see if there has being a person brought in named Richard McHibbert"
"Ok but there is no point"
Fiona got her phone out and called the local directory office, got the hospitals phone number and rang..............
this is very well done, Amy. You are handling the dialogue (conversation) very well.
Grainne added this:
'No, sorry, no one of that description here,' was the answer she kept getting. And then a suspitious voice said, 'who are you, anyway?
Quickly Fiona rang off. Suddenly she began to cry. 'I don't know what to do,'
'I do,' said Kate in a quiet voice. 'We must go back to the wood. That's where it all started.
By the time they reached the wood the few snowflakes had turned into a blizzard. They could hardly see where they were going. And that was when it happened...
Good idea, Grainne! I’m glad you’re bringing back the idea of the snowstorm, again.
Rosie added this:
Josh slipped, and hurt his ankle really bad. "THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING" Josh yelled trying so hard to get up.
Suddently they heard laughing, and a branch brake, just like it had happened earlier that day.
"COLLIN LEAHY COME OUT FROM WHERE EVER YOU ARE WE KNOW YOU ARE HERE"
They heard nothing only the wind blow.
"Kate are you sure"
"Yes now just stand still and wait"
There was a sound, a sound of someone walking, Josh was still struggling to get up. Their standing in front of them was Collin again, but he wasn't laughing, he wasn't transparent, he was pale like he had seen a ghost.
"Collin, what is going on" whispered Fiona.
"I I I I Don't know, something ssstrrrangeee is happpening at mmmmy hoouse" Collin said in a scared cold voice.
"What is happening at your house"
"There is a tall man there and I don't know who he is" Collin explained.
"Did you come here after school, today"
"HERE" yelled Josh in a angry tone.
"Yes, but I was just playing a joke and then all this started happening, and there is another one of me, but he is TRANSPARENT"
"I know, we saw him he was outside our house, would you happen to know where our parents and Grandmother is"
"No, I was coming to apologise to all of you for frightening you here today but there was someone in your house.....Sorta like a ghost"
"MAYBE IT WAS THE OTHER YOU"
Lets go and find out........
Rosie, you have a wonderful imagination. I like the idea of the two Colins.
Claire added this:
Began Fiona but at the same moment Kate screamed there it is again. Listen! That’s not a branch braking. That’s the sound of heavy door slaming. There must be a house in this wood somewhere.
‘There’s no house in this wood,’’ said Colin but was it Colin? The voice was very deep and very low.
The wind was blowing so hard now and the snowflakes were swirling around and around. They were blinded by them.
‘‘Fiona where are you?’’ screamed Thomas. ‘‘I’m frightened. I want to go home.’’
And that was the moment when they heard the noise again.
Splendid, Claire - very exciting bit!
Amy added this:
"We are going to be fine, Thomas, Don't worry" Fiona said.
"We don't know if this is the real Collin"
"Lets give him a Quiz" Kate suggested.
The questions went on and on and on, Collin got very few right.
"Collin we know your not the real Collin" shouted Josh "The real Collin wouldn't come and apologise to me"
"NOW TELL US WHERE ARE OUR PARENTS" demanded Fiona.
Collins face was turn red and he began to fade, he was see through!
"RUN, LETS FIND THAT COTTAGE" Kate shouted.
It seemed like they had been running for hours, but they found another part of the forest, they turned around it looked like SEE THROUGH COLLIN had disappeared, somewhere. They walked slowly and there in a hiddden place was the cottage. They opened the wooden door and inside the small little room with no light only a window was COLLIN.
"Collin, are you the real Collin" Josh asked.
"I am, please free me"
"How did this happen" Kate asked.
"Today I scared you and ran off, I tripped on the ice and knocked myself out when I woke up I was here, the person who owns this house was made that we were walking in his forest and told me to give him the names of you, I said I wouldn't, but he was getting really angry, so I did, then he touched my head, walked out and ran off, I thought he locked the door"........
You’re carrying on the story wonderfully, Amy. Just keep checking that you are fitting in with the other bits – hard to do, I know!
Sinead added this:
But ofelesley he didnt or did he?
"Maby he was just trying to scar you by making you think he locked the door?"
questined Fiona." Yea maby someone is comming later"Wandered Josh?
When all of a sudden KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
" youed better hide"Whispeared Coiln.
As the person tryed to open the door strangley it was LOCKED!
It was a tall man . They knew that because
they could somehow see his blond hair
through the foggy window. Until.........
Sinead, this is very exciting. I like the mystery about whether the door is locked or not. It makes everything very mysterious.
Sinead added this:
Just then Fiona was ruting through the big cupbord and in a small drawer there was a small note foled over three or four times." Look what I found " announced Fiona!
" What is it ?" Asked Kate.
AS Fiona slowely but surely opened up the fouled piece o paper inside the numbers 24 were written.
Just then Fiona realised that the numbers 24 was her dads moible number added together........
Amy added this:
As the tall person at the door was still trying to get in, Fiona was thinking about the number written down on the note. The number 24 had many signs: Our house number, 24 Coaches Avenue, My older sister Aisling is turning 24 this month, and the date of Mums biethday is the 24 of March.....But was has it got to do with Colin?
The tall man walk into the room, he had round sunglasses on and a black Suit, he looked like a........bodyguard or someone.
He took of his Glasses, Fiona and Kate were hiding in beside the chair that had been in the corner of the room and Thomas and Josh hid under the curtains, that was long, you could bearly see them. Kate whispered to Fiona"that was the man at Colins house" "The man said in a deep voice"MY MASTER MUST SEE YOU" Colin got up from the place he was sitting in and followed him...........
Amy, I wouldn’t be surprised if you were a best-selling author in a few years. You are full of ideas.
Shannon from America added this:
"Oh, no!" cried Josh,"I guess it's just one disaster after another."
"Come on, guys,we've got to follow them!" Fiona explained. Kate stared at her. Up until now, Fiona hadn't had much of a say in this.
"Well, it's the only possible solution," Thomas suggested. They tried the door but...it was LOCKED!
"How are we ever going to get out!" Kate blurted.
"Wait!" Fiona cried. "I figgured out what the number 24 means! Look!" And slowly, as they all turned their heads, they saw a case with a lock on it. Fiona turned the numbers and slowy it opened! Inside was a note saying: USE THE WINDOWS.
"This is a joke and we're the victims!" Josh cried. "It's like we're giant's playthings or something!"
"Wait, the windows MIGHT help us," Kate repiled slowy. For and the very moment, the window were rapidly change color and a voic was calling out "I HAVE WHAT YOU WANT"........
A great new twist to the story, Shannon. That was clever using the 24 as the numbers on the combination lock of the case. How is your weather over in New york, by the way. I saw you had snowstorms there.
Amy added this:
"What was that" Thomas said "And what do we want"
"What to you think we want, our parents back" siad Josh.
Josh, and Thomas ran to the window.
"Wait" Fiona yelled.
"We don't know who it is outside the window, I mean it could be any one even THE OTHER COLIN" she added with a voice in terror.
"I think I'll take my chances" Josh said bravly.
He walked over to the window put his leg out and climbed into the garden.
"Guys come out, its no-one bad it's just Evin, my friend"
Kate, Thomas and Fiona ran over to the window and tried to get out. The last person to leave the room was Fiona, was tall and was not able to climb through the window. "I can't get through the window, you will have to go on without me"
"No Fiona we can't you were the person who helped us out of here anyway" Kate said with tears rolling down her cheaks.
"It's ok, Colin will be back soon, and I will ask him how to get out"
"Evin, do you know what is happening" Josh asked.
"No but I have watched it happening, I saw your parents being taken away, but I don't know where too, so I went in your house to find clues"
"Thats who you saw by the window Josh" interrupted Thomas.
"Anyway, I saw you out in your garden and I ran out of the house"
"Josh, Thomas, Evin and Kate go and find our parents, if you can't find them text me on my mobile" Fiona said.
"Ok Fiona, I will try"
"Be brave, Kate I know you can be"
"Bye Fiona" And they ran off like a thunder bolt.
Fiona sat in the cold room, alone and hungry. She was waiting for hours and terrible thoughts went through her mind , Kate, Josh and Thomas have been hurt, where are they Oh no its all my fault, I should have gone with them. She fell asleep and had bad dreams about "SEE THROUGH COLIN AND HERSELF AND HER BROTHERS AND SISTER"
See was awoken by the door opening she jumped out of the spot she was sitting in and hid. A police man, walked in........
That was a good idea having the window too small for Fiona. Somehow it heightens the tension to have Fiona separated from the rest.
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